Got a lot on my mind, if the title of this post doesn’t give that away!
First, after my lovely chapter 1 of my current ms, I’ve sputtered and faltered and am still struggling with chapter 2. I was feeling uber-frustrated about it all, until it just hit me that chapter 1 was kind of that way too. I wrote and re-wrote and re-re-wrote that thing, trying to make it awesome before turning it in for critiquing. And guess what then? I re-re-re-wrote the blasted thing, using the critique information to make it better. I’m really pleased with it now, but that’s not the point. The point is that I had a similar experience with that first chapter. Lots of reworking of things, lots of re-writing, lots of stuff moved to the scratch pad file. I have a couple of options here. I can charge forward with stuff I’m less than pleased about or I can accept that there may be a good deal of struggle with this particular manuscript. I think a good deal of the struggle comes from the fact that I’ve had this story in my head and heart for so many years, waiting for me to be “ready” to write it out. I’m hugely psyched out about wanting to do it justice and about finally getting it written. I need to learn to take a deep breath, let off the pressure, and just see where the writing goes (and silence the history major in me who says “but events have to be in sequence because one impacts the next”).
Magna Cum Murder begins on Friday, October 24th, in Indianapolis. It has been my privilege to volunteer at this conference for the past 12 years or so. A few years ago my husband joined me as a volunteer, and not long after that we started giving a panel each year. Our first was discussing local haunts. After that year we evolved to giving one on ghost-hunting in real life. We’ve had a good reception for that each year. I’m very excited about doing the panel again this year because we have some new stuff to share with people from some recent investigations. It’s exciting stuff and it opens up good avenues for discussion and education as well.
I am also anticipating November and NaNoWriMo. I don’t have a solid idea for a NaNo project yet, but that’s one thing I’m not worrying over. If no new project idea springs forth, I can be a NaNo rebel and use the month to get 50,000 words down on an existing project. In fact, I’m strongly inclined in that direction. Maybe it will be the kick in the pants I need to stop sweating every word in the current project and just get something down. After all, you can’t do a second draft until you’ve completed a first draft.
On the subject of NaNo, a snarky piece from a website I won’t name (because they disgust me and I won’t drive traffic to them) was going around last week. I’d seen it before but it still made me angry. Basically the writer felt that we NaNoers should skip attempting to write a novel and spend our time reading because a) we’d only wind up creating crap anyway and b) apparently anyone ambitious enough to attempt to write a novel is not someone who reads. I really wanted to go slap this sour grapes person. Clearly she’s never been brave enough to attempt NaNoWriMo. She doesn’t create – she criticizes. So here’s what I say to anyone who’s thinking of trying NaNoWriMo:
Maybe your manuscript will suck. Maybe you’ll hate it and chuck it in the bin as soon as the month is over. But you will gain something from the experience of creating it. You will learn something about yourself (even if it’s only how much caffeine you can handle at one time) and that will be valuable to you, whether you continue writing or not. Don’t let the negative Nancys of the world (even those in your head) chase you off. Give it a chance, give yourself a chance. It is worth it and so are you.